Didn’t Know That Kids Kitchen Set Had “A Gender”

So if you are like me, although you are on social media, you try and not spiral into the social media vortex. But every so often…something grabs my attention. On Thursday, December 2nd, 2021, social media was in a massive frenzy over photos of folks posting their sons playing with their kitchen sets on Facebook.

Now in a world where we are all secure in our identities and people mind their own business, it would be something you could scroll past.But no. Folks had a good amount to say about the young boys playing in the kitchen.

“…I wouldn’t buy my young son a kitchen set the same as I wouldn’t buy my daughter a toolset.”

“Grill sets are for boys & kitchen sets are for girls.”

“I’m not gifting Lil son a kitchen set unless he wanna be a chef.”

*clears throat*

Maybe I am wrong here, but according to Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs, basic needs such as food, shelter, and clothing are the baseline for achieving self-actualization.  Yet, the gender norms placed on certain activities such as cleaning and cooking hinder all parties involved.

Let me break this down.

In a Roles of Men and Woman in the Household Study by Gallup in 2019, it was found that heteronormative U.S. households still hold traditional ideologies when it comes to maintaining the home.  Over 50% of participants felt it was the woman’s role to do activities such as cooking, cleaning, and doing the laundry in the house. In comparison, men were seen to handle household items such as yard work and car maintenance over 50% of the time.  Although more households share these responsibilities, there is still an underlying “traditional” mindset that many household tasks are better suited for specific genders. 

If we deny young boys the right to learn basic human needs because they are “boys,” first and foremost, we are setting them up for a life of codependency.  If you cannot take care of yourself, how are we supposed to create healthy relationships that do not solely rely on someone taking care of your basic needs? Simmer on that. We are now shifting that into the more extensive conversation of planting the seeds that grow into Toxic Masculinity. Before you jump in the comments to argue with me *pause*, I am not saying masculinity is toxic, but the constant adherence to gender norms that harm society is a problem.

If we do not think boys should be learning how to cook… then who are we saying should?

*sips tea*

Lastly, we need to stop policing children’s form of play and self-expression when presented healthily and developmentally.  Allowing a child to play with any toy or curate any space that can build self-esteem and self-sufficiency should be a good thing regardless of their gender identity.  The same way my younger brother knows how to knit and sew, I know how to change my oil and tires.  My parents did not teach me gender norms; they taught me self-sufficiency, which was one of the best lessons.  Looking at tasks to be completed as girl or boy, women or man, she or he is not progressive.

Come on! It is almost 2022!

So in closing, CHEF IT UP, KINGS!

Do not let the gender norms of society tell you what is or is not for you.  Whether cooking out of necessity, fun or experimenting with a potential hobby, do it! For the parents who understand this, keep it up because we can only change the narratives but create our own within our households.  Besides, the food is fantastic, and who would not want to learn how to be a pro in the kitchen?